In this episode, we’re diving into a topic that sparks a lot of conversation and varying viewpoints: Husbands won’t let their wives have a homebirth or freebirth.

This topic often sparks heated discussions and diverse opinions on social media, and I want to share some insights and practical steps to help you navigate this situation.

Understanding Your Partner’s Personality and Relationship Dynamics

First, consider your partner’s personality and your relationship dynamics.

Are they generally open-minded? Can you usually have productive conversations with them about new ideas? Reflecting on these aspects is crucial because they significantly impact discussions about homebirth or freebirth.

It’s important to be in a healthy relationship where open conversations are the norm. If your partner usually makes all the decisions and isn’t open to compromise, it might be challenging to change their mindset about homebirth.

If you’re in such a relationship, seeking counseling could be beneficial to help navigate these conversations safely, especially during pregnancy.

 

You can listen to this episode using the player below, or using your favourite platform to subscribe and listen there.

The Realities of Relationships and Pregnancy

Sometimes, messages on social media suggest extreme measures like divorcing a partner who disagrees with homebirth. However, it’s essential to be realistic about your relationship.

If your partner has never been open-minded, pushing for a significant change during pregnancy might not be the best approach.

 

When Your Partner is Stubborn but Supportive

If your partner is generally supportive but stubborn, there are ways to approach the conversation. Sharing your knowledge and excitement about homebirth gradually can help.

For example, I spent time educating my husband about homebirth, even though he initially wasn’t interested.

Playing podcasts around the house and sharing what I learned helped him understand and support my choices eventually.

 

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A perfect example

I came across a Reddit post where a husband was adamantly against homebirth due to fears stemming from a family member’s emergency C-section.

Despite his wife’s detailed explanations and enthusiasm, his fears overshadowed the benefits of homebirth. This story highlights the importance of addressing fears with factual information and, if necessary, involving a third party like a doula or midwife to provide expert insights.

 

Bringing Your Partner on the Journey

It’s common for women to be far ahead in understanding and preparing for homebirth compared to their partners. Men often take longer to catch up.

It’s essential to bring them on the journey gradually, sharing information and experiences that highlight the benefits and safety of homebirth.

 

Practical Steps for Open Discussions

If a full freebirth isn’t something your partner can support, compromise.

  • Start with a calm setting, find a time and place where your partner is relaxed and open to conversation.
  • Share your feelings and express why homebirth is important to you and how you feel about it.
  • Provide Information like documentaries or articles that explain the benefits and safety of homebirth.
  • Involve experts. You can arrange a meeting with a midwife or doula who can address your partner’s concerns and provide expert insights.

I shared my own journey with my husband, who initially didn’t understand my desire for a homebirth.

Over time, through constant conversations, exposure to birth content, and professional input, he grew to support and even advocate for our homebirth experience.

I hope this episode and blog post provide some helpful insights and steps to navigate this important decision.

If you have any questions or want to share your experiences, please reach out. You can book a call with me here. I’m ready to support you on your journey to an empowered birth.

 

Ashley is on a mission to raise the rates of women having vaginal birth after Caesarean worldwide and empower women planning VBACs and HBACS.(Homebirth after Caesarean).

As a dedicated birth coach and mentor, Ashley works intimately with pregnant women, guiding them through the journey of overcoming fear and mindset challenges associated with VBACs and HBACS.

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